


Wait-WHAT?

by Jmdavis25



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Richie Tozier & Stanley Uris Are Best Friends, Richie's son is dating Stan's daughter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-27
Updated: 2019-12-27
Packaged: 2021-02-17 22:07:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21950446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jmdavis25/pseuds/Jmdavis25
Summary: Stan blinked-he hadn't heard his daughter right. There was no way he had heard his daughter right. But Nate's arm was around Addie's shoulder. She was staring at him lovingly. “Our kids are dating.”“I can see it now,” Richie smirked as he put his arm around Stan. “Addison Kaspbrak-Tozier.”"I think I'm gonna throw up."
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Original Character/Original Character, Patricia Blum Uris/Stanley Uris
Kudos: 44





	Wait-WHAT?

Every Tuesday night since Eddie and Richie had moved in together, Stan and Patty came over at six on the dot to have dinner. Over the years the table had grown bigger. From four seats, to five seats, to six seats, seven seats, to nine seats, then finally to ten seats as of three years ago. There were only three exceptions during the twenty year time period.

The first had been over a year after the tradition started when Stan and Patty had went on their honeymoon. They were in an airport in Buenos Aries trying desperately to get a flight back to New York because Stan had ended up contracting the stomach flu while they were there and wanted to go home.The second time wasn't until two years later. Because Stan and Patty had a prior engagement. Something about wanting to have their first born child in a hospital. The third time had actually been Richie and Eddie's fault. It had happened because they had been in Boston with a client of Eddie's who just so happened to want to meet his entire family. So the entire Kaspbrak-Tozier clan had been in Massachusetts for three days longer than they should have been.

Now here they were-dinner with ten people around the table, as always, with everyone pretending to like the overly dried chicken that Richie and Eddie's thirteen year old daughter Lola had insisted she would cook herself. Richie making whatever dad joke that came into his mind-all the kids laughing when they saw Stan roll his eyes and pretend that his wife wasn't holding in a smile. 

"Dad, Pops." Richie and Eddie both turned their attention to their oldest child Nate. They had adopted Nate when he was six months old after his mother-a sixteen year old runaway with a pretty bad drug habit had tried to leave him on a bus. Eddie had grabbed Nate and ran after her, only for her to say she didn't want a baby and for Eddie to keep him if he cared that much. After about three conversations and some legalities, Richie and Eddie had adopted him. "You guys like Addie, right?"

"No Nate, we invite over her entire family because we can't stand her." Richie replied while rolling his eyes. "That's why I changed her diapers-actually changing her diapers made me hate her. She was one stink-"

"Beep beep Richie." Addie interrupted him with a glare that only extremely evil people-and people who were blood related to Stanley Uris could do. 

"Did we really have to pass that down to the next generation?" Richie asked.

"I don't think you should beep beep Richie." stated Phillip Uris, the reason for Stan and Patty missing their second dinner in twenty years. "I think everyone should know how much my little sister stinks."

"Shut up idiot."

"You-"

"Settle down, both of you." Patty commanded. "I swear we have less trouble with Jacob than with either of you." Patty gestured to the three year old that she had punched Richie over when he had called him, 'the oopsy baby' after telling him she was pregnant again, who was currently sitting on Stan's lap very entertained with his spaghetti. 

"Sorry Mom." Both Phillip and Addie replied simultaneously.

"Anyway," Everyone turned their attention back to Nate who now had a goofy smirk on his face. "We were talking and decided to tell you here when we were all together." Nate paused in a moment that really proved he was Richie's son before finishing. "Addie and I are dating."

"What?"

"What?"

_"What?"_

"I know this might come as a shock," Addie continued for Nate. "But we're in love."

Stan blinked-he hadn't heard his daughter right. There was no way he had heard his daughter right. But Nate's arm was around Addie's shoulder. She was staring at him lovingly. “Our kids are dating."

“I can see it now,” Richie smirked as he put his arm around Stan. “Addison Kaspbrak-Tozier.”

"I think I'm gonna throw up."

"Dad!" Addie practically shrieked. "Why can't you act more like Richie?!"

"Because I'm a sane human being."

"What I mean is _he_ 's not freaking out."

"He _is_ too. Aren't you Rich?" Stanley waited for Richie to say something and tilted his head when he didn't. "Rich?"

"I knew it."

Eddie, Patty, and Stanley's heads turned to Richie. Surely, they hadn't heard him right. "You knew our son had a girlfriend and you didn't tell me?"

"It's pretty obvious Spaghetti," Eddie rolled his his eyes but Richie continued before he could protest the nickname. "Our son was acting way to happy. He-" Richie stopped and started laughing. "Oh my god did you guys actually buy that? Stan you remember right?"

Stanley groaned as the memory of Richie coming out to him in the tenth grade came into his mind. "You're a fucking asshole."

"Stanley the children!" Richie exclaimed with fake shock. He reached and put his hands over Jacob's ears before Stan swatted his hand away. "Girls, Nate I am so sorry for your Uncle-well fuck I guess we can't call him Uncle Stanley anymore because then Nate would be dating his cousin." Richie held in a laugh at all the groans from everyone at the table. "And I'm sorry we aren't moving to Kentucky."

"Get to the point before I slaughter you."

Richie winked at Eddie. "Save that kind of talk for the bedroom stud." A chorus of eight "Ughs" came from the table and Richie laughed while Eddie slapped his head. "Seriously though, Phil why don't you take the twins and your brother to a movie."

"There's a great documentary that I think you'll love." Patty started only to stop when she interpreted the 'No way in hell' look that Phillip was giving her. "Fine just please nothing over pg-13. If Jacob has a nightmare _you_ will be the one to comfort him Phillip Uris."

"Fine." Phillip reached his hand out and Richie handed him four twenties.

"Keep the change, you're mowing my lawn tomorrow."

"Fine." Phillip repeated before Patty handed him her keys and he grabbed Jacob's hand. "Anything you want to see bud?"

"Frozen!" Was the last thing they heard before the door shut. Now all four adults were staring at the two teenagers in front of them.

Richie pulled his phone out of his pocket and snapped a picture of Addie and Nate. "Look Stanny aren't they just the cutest couple."

"Beep beep Pops." Nate spoke up before rolling his eyes. "Stan-uh I mean-wait do I have to call you Mr. Uris now?"

"Of course not!" Stanley shook his head trying to calm the last bit of nausea that he had. After all they were just kids, it wasn't like they were adults in a committed relationship. It would fizzle.

Patty took a deep breath. "Truth be told, I'm glad you're going to be Addie's first boyfriend. We know you'll treat her right."

"And if you don't you'll be in huge trouble." Richie stated before pointing finger guns at his son. He turned to Stan and Patty. "You guys have had the talk right?"

Patty looked down sheepishly while Stanley's face turned bright red. "Of course we've had the talk with her! She's sixteen Richie! We are not going to be Grandparents anytime soon!"

" _Actually."_ All the adults snapped their heads to Addie before she started laughing. "Oh my god Nate you were right! Look at their faces!"

"Nate you're grounded for giving me and your Pops premature heart attacks." Eddie snapped. "Do you know how many teenagers aren't actually joking about pregnancy?" A small picture of Nate's biological mother entered his mind and he made a mental note to try and look her up again. "Just for that you're watching the video again."

"No Dad please!" Nate begged. He had been forced to watch a three hour video depicting stds, pregnancy, and of course childbirth when he had turned fourteen. Eddie had made him watch it over and over until he had gotten a one hundred on the test he had passed out every time after he watched it.

"I think Addie should watch it too." Patty stated with a small glare towards her daughter. "I am too young to even consider being a grandmother."

_Ten Years Later_

Stanley had sucked it up and walked his daughter down the aisle. Himself, Richie, Ben, Beverly, Bill, and Mike had all betted on whose child was going to get married first. Everyone betting on their own child while respectively hoping it was someone else's. At the reception he looked as all eleven of their kids were sitting together. Addie and Nate were holding hands while wearing dopey smiles that he recognized from all of the losers club's weddings. Phillip was sitting next to Jake-as he now insisted being called and rolled his eyes as Miranda Denbrough was complaining about how her boyfriend had missed the wedding entirely. Byron and James Hanlon were talking to Zane Hansom about somebody they all knew from their classes at NYU. While Cadence and Lola Tozier were fawning over their brother and his new wife. 

Stanley shook his head before grabbing three shots and downing one immediately before heading outside. He downed another shot as he stood outside of banquet hall. How the fuck had this happened? How the fuck had his daughter stayed with Richie Tozier, the most annoying mother fucker in the world, and his best friend's, son for seven years. How the fuck was his daughter now Addison Kaspbrak-Tozier? 

"You alright Stan the man?" Richie asked as he lit up a cigarette and took a seat on a small bench about three feet away from Stanley grabbing Stan's last shot in the process before downing it himself. "You look like you're about to hurl?"

"I did." Stanley breathed slowly before going and sitting next to Richie. "How the hell did this happen? My daughter and your son? What are the fucking chances?"

Any other person would probably start yelling at Stanley. Any other person would probably ask him how he could talk about their son like that? But Richie knew what he meant. Richie knew it was more about his child getting married, at all. "Considering that they saw each other every day at school, had dinner together at least once a week, and have known each other since before they were both one I'd say pretty fucking lightly."

Stan nodded his head. At least Richie had answered with logic instead of a joke. "I know."

"And hey, you could've ended up with Bill and Audra's son as a son in law instead. I'd say you lucked out."

Stanley rolled his eyes and hid the growing grin on his face. "Bill and Audra's son is five Richie."

"I know, talk about an oopise baby."

Stanley snickered despite himself knowing full well Patty would hit him if she knew what he had just done. But screw that because Patrick had been born after Bill's botched vasectomy. "You're nuts Rich."

"What about 'em?" Richie looked down at his crotch before smirking. "Let me guess, Eds told you about-"

"Beep beep Richie." Stan interrupted desperately not wanting to hear the end of whatever it was Richie was about to say. 

"At least you and me'll share grandkids. When do you think they'll tell us their expecting? One year or-"

"They already are." Stan interrupted him. "No they didn't tell me, but Addie's not drinking any of her wine-"

"Nope." Richie interrupted him smirking slightly. "Your daughter and I just wanted to see if you would catch that. Nate told me they're being careful, they want to wait a couple years."

"Thank God." Stanley stole Richie's cigarette in a moment that had him questioning his sanity before taking a drag of it and handing it back to Richie. "I'm not ready to be a Grandpa, at least not with a Kaspbrak-Tozier, not just yet." 

Almost on cue the door to the banquet hall opened and everybody was rushing outside to see Mr. and Mrs. Kaspbrak-Tozier get into the just married limo. 

"Wait!" Addie exclaimed right before she shut the door. She grabbed Nate's hand and rushed back out of the limo. "Richie get a picture of all the losers club kids!"

"My pleasure." Richie laughed as he got his cellphone out of his pocket. Watching with a smile as all eleven of the losers club's kids got together. Seven boys, four girls, ranging from ages twenty seven to five. He bit his tongue not wanting to announce to both Bill and Stan that both of their oldest kids were currently very _very_ drunk before taking the picture.

"Thanks! Addie hugged Richie before she and Nate went back to the limo. 

Richie and Stanley grinned as their respective spouses joined their sides and they all watched their kids ride away _married_ in a limo. And it probably would've made Stan feel better to know that Nate and Addie wouldn't have a child for four more years, that's not to say he didn't have any grandchildren in a year though.

_One Year Later_

"I fucking hate you." Miranda Denbrough cursed as she followed Phillip into the room where Stanley was holding their two month old daughter Erin. "You know my ex boyfriend-"

"I know all a fucking bout your ex boyfriend Randi-"

"Don't call me Randi!"

"I know because he punched me in the face after Nate and Addie's wedding."

"Because you deserved it!"

"Oh yeah I deserved it for fucking his girlfriend."

"Will you shut up? Your dad is right there!"

"Oh I'm sorry," Phillip turned to Stanley who had the blankest look on his face. "Dad did you know that Randi and I fucked?"

"Phillip!"

"Randi he's holding our fucking baby, he knows we fucked."

"That doesn't mean you have to say it like that!"

"Well it certainly wasn't making love."

"Do you not love our daughter?"

"Of course I love our daughter!"

"Then we fucking made love you idiot!"

Stanley rolled his eyes and bounced Erin on his knee while tuning out his son and Miranda's arguing. He remembered what he had said at Nate and Addie's wedding about not ready to be a grandfather with a Kaspbrak-Tozier baby, he was guessing it would've been a fucking peaceful affair over this.


End file.
